"Baby I'm feeling really down and need to rush off to the hospital to run some tests" my wife said in-between chunks of food in her mouth. 

Today is my day off from work and it's a coincidence that my kids are also on midterm break. 

My wife would be leaving me with a typical example of Tom and Jerry to cater for all through the day. 

The last time such happened, I almost sold my gender right. 

I tried all I could to dodge the reality of me being home alone with my kids but it proved abortive. My wife headed to the hospital and left me staring at the kids like this . Kids of Age Three and Six respectively.

I was waiting for the first move but none came. That's unusual. 

Not until I saw water trooping from the direction of the kitchen that it occurred to me that, those creatures have left the water tap running and the sink which is blocked by plates can't allow water to pass. 

They tried stopping the water but ended up spoiling the tap. So they returned and sat peacefully waiting for the calamity to announce itself. Well, it sure did! 

I raced off to the kitchen to bring things to normalcy. I mopped my life out and drips of sweats filled my face. 

I returned to see the smaller kid hanging of the plasma TV in the living room. I ran to drop him and he came crashing along with the television which fell faced flat on the floor. 

I refused to turn the television to see for myself what you all are expecting to hear. Their mother would do that when she returns. 

I stood with tears welled up in my eyes staring at the children. 

All I could mutter was "Do you want to kill me?" They shook their head negatively. 

I decided deep within me that I wasn't gonna have a child again. This two problems are more than enough. 

I sat genuflecting on the next line of action When my wife came in screaming happily waving a paper in her hands. 

Something I really dreaded to hear at the moment. "Baby I'm pregnant" she announced. One more look at the kids. 

I fainted peacefully