Sometimes I just want to stare at the clouds as the float in the sky.

To just lay down on the dew soaked grass and stare up, right in the middle of a field somewhere. 

It doesn't matter where so far as it's far away. Where I can be alone with my thoughts. And with no one to ask if i was done with the dishes or any random music stealing into the stillness on the night. 

Have you ever seen the night sky, especially the way the stars sparkle and glow and how the moon hangs there were and like the Queen she is.

I love the view the most when there are no people around. Sometimes I just want to sit under and stare at the moon with my book open. All alone... cause that's when the good stuff always hit. 

I guess I just don't love the clouds but the night sky in itself.

This is not the first time I had to check my phone since you left, and I don't think it would be the last. 

Why did you have to go, were did I go wrong? 

Remember I told you I did not cope well with new things or conditions, remember you promised to correct my wrongs cause that was what two people who were prepared to share forever did for each other. Was I too strong with my feelings or what?

Remember I told you I did not want to start what would eventually end. Remember I told you I wasn't prepared to lose anyone cause of how involved I got with things. Remember how I loved to wear your shirt alone as I walked about the house?

You promised... Remember. 

But you know what? I don't hate you. Not even when I wake up to a lonely bed. Not when your side is cold I have to curl into myself. Not when I hear your laugh in a park an turn but find nobody. Not when I have to breakdown in the bathroom because I forgot to turn on the heater again, and you never forgot because you knew how much I hated cold baths. Not when I turn to cuddle but end up hugging my pillow close. 

I don't hate you when I see your favourite mug when I prepare my tea in the morning in my way out. 

I don't hate you. Truly I don't I just feel sad and miss you so much even when I know you are never coming back.