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Ematabs78 2 yrs 758
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Ematabs78
~3.3 mins read
“My boss drove a luxury car everyday and it was my duty to greet him and to open the gates for him, as I worked as a watchman in his villa. But he never responded back to my greetings.
One day he saw me opening the garbage bags outside the villa in search for any leftover food. But, as usual he never even looked at me, it was like as if he never saw anything!
The very next day I saw a paper bag at the same place, but it was clean and the food inside was covered well. It was fresh and good food like someone had just brought it from the supermarket. I didn't bother as to where it came from, I just took the paper bag and I was so happy about it.
Every day I found this paper bag at the same place with fresh vegetables and all that we needed for home. This became my daily routine. I was eating and sharing this food with my wife and kids. I was wondering who this fool could be?! To forget his paper bag full of fresh food everyday.
One day there was a big problem in the villa and I was told that my boss has died. There were too many guests coming to the villa that day and I didn't get any food that day, so I thought that one of the guests must have taken it. But the same thing happened the 2nd day, the 3rd day and the 4th day.
It went on like this for a few weeks and I found it difficult to provide food for my family, so I decided to ask the wife of my boss for a raise in my salary or else I would quit my job as a watchman.
After I told her, she was shocked, and asked me, how come you never complained about your salary for the last 2 years? And why is this salary not enough for you now? I gave her so many excuses but she was never convinced!
Finally in the end, I decided to tell her the truth, I told her the entire story of the bag of groceries, and as to how it was my daily provision. She then asked me as to when this stopped? I told her after the death of her husband. And then I realized that I stopped seeing the paper bag immediately after the death of my boss. Why didn't I ever think of this before? That it was my boss who was providing this for me? I guess it was because I never thought that a person who never replied to my greetings could ever be this generous!
His wife started to cry and I told her to please stop crying and that I'm really sorry that I asked for a raise, I didn't know that it was your husband who was providing me with the meals, I’ll remain as a watchman and be happy to provide my service.
His wife told me, I'm crying because I've finally found the 7th person my husband was giving this bag full of food. I knew my husband was giving 7 people everyday, I had already found the 6 people, and all these days I was searching for the 7th person. And today I found out.
From that day onwards, I started to receive the bag full of food again, but this time his son was bringing it to my house and giving it to my hand. But whenever I thanked him, he never replied! Just like his dad!
One day, I told him THANK YOU in a very loud voice! He replied back to me to please not be offended when he doesn't reply, because he has a hearing problem, just like his dad!”
Oh! We have been wrong so many times judging others without knowing the true story behind their actions. Be kind and courteous in dealing with others, for everyone is fighting a hard battle. Be careful, not everything is about you. Before you assume, there is this thing called ASKING.
Don’t just jump to conclusion, because that is truly not an exercise, it may cause you more harm at the end of the day. Many of our problems are caused by how we process what happens around us. Don’t judge a situation you have never been in. Be humble enough to learn. You do not know it all. Lets change the way we feel about ourselves and others.
There are two sides to a story. Don’t believe everything you hear.
Everyone you meet is fighting a battle you know nothing about.......
(Copied)
Ematabs78
2 yrs
641
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Ematabs78
Happy boxing day
~0.2 mins read
Boxing Day was traditionally a day off for servants- a day when they get a special Christmas box from their masters.
Boxing Day isn't named for leftover Christmas gift boxes or the sport of boxing. While its origins are lost to time, many believe the holiday was derived from a British tradition of charitable giving.
Ematabs78 2 yrs 74
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Ematabs78
Languages Of Love
~2.0 mins read
There are lots of small but heartfelt ways to tell your special one just exactly how you feel without having to verbalize it, and you can cater it to their love language so they're sure to pick up what you're putting down.
These are the ways people express and receive love. Allow yourself and your partner to live your way, happily ever after.
1. Giving gifts
Not necessarily based in materialism as you may think, this love language is about the thought and meaning that goes into giving and receiving gifts.
Surprise your special one with tickets to a concert or event you know they would love. Pay attention to the things they mention they want by keeping a secret list on your phone.
Then, when their birthday or a holiday comes along, you have the perfect gift ideas that you know they will love, but will also show you’re paying attention.
2. Quality time
Rather than clock watching, this love language is about the quality moments spent together. If you have a demanding job or life commitments and can’t spare very much time, don’t stress.
Quality time individuals don’t necessarily need a lot of attention. They want to see your actions, specifically how you prioritize making time to spend with them and focusing on the relationship.
Make a reservation for dinner somewhere special, just for the two of you, set some time aside every night where you both put your phones away and just catch up on your day.
3. Words of affirmation
This way of loving uses words to express care and affection. Small articulations of appreciation and adoration are the key to this love language. Statements such as “thank you for cooking this delicious meal” or “you look amazing today” are the things that make these people tick.
For folks whose love language is words of affirmation, compliments are the most effective way to communicate how you feel, so use your words.
4. Acts of service
Usually, it’s not just sending money or giving cheques but providing certain services when your partner needs it most. All you have to do is to place meaning on taking care of something so that your partner doesn’t have to.
5. Physical touch
For people who talk this love language, actions such as holding hands, a back rub, a kiss, a hug and sex are all significant expressions of love.
Depending on the type of relationship, varying levels of physical interactions, with consent, are essential. The absence of cuddles and other touch-based expressions of affection can leave people who receive love this way feeling isolated and unloved.
Ematabs78 2 yrs 261
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Ematabs78
Stages Of A Relationship
~1.2 mins read
Relationship is not a rocket science neither are there chemical compounds you react to produce a beautiful relationship. There are basically five stages every relationship passes through:
The first is called the Attraction stage: Every relationship pass through this stage. This is where you only focus on the good things and similarities between each other. You spend a lot of time together and imagine you are made for each other. You avoid fights and it seems nothing will ever cause fight between both of you.
The second stage is the Realization stage: You start finding flaws in your partner. It doesn't mean you don't love each other but things are not as beautiful as in the beginning. You start fighting and doubting if you're really in love. The romance or spark in the relationship seems to be declining.
3. The third stage is the Anger stage: Little or inconsequential issues tends to make you angry. It is at this stage you think of breaking up and leaving each other and blame each other for no reasons.
4. Stage four is Acceptance:
You become certain that both of you are totally different personalities and you have different qualities and flaws but still you have accepted each other. You come to the realization that things cannot be run in the fantasy world for a lifetime. There comes a time when you have to act with maturity.
The final stage is Commitment
You get to understand each other better with time. You also know everything about each other and this sets up a thought in your heart that you don't need anyone in your life as partner. You have fallen in love with your partner forever and this is the most honest and genuine thing in a relationship.
Ematabs78 2 yrs 47
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Ematabs78
Unhealthy Compromises You Should Not Make For The Sake Of A Relationship
~2.4 mins read
It's not a big deal to sometimes reconsider some old, selfish ways and show a willingness to meet your partner halfway.
It's a cool way to show that you are ready to pitch in with effort on your part, in order for the relationship to work for things to sync perfectly. But then, there's a limit to how far you can possibly take this.
There are things you cannot overlook in a relationship, some grounds you should not shift, and some compromises you really don't have to make. If you have ever wondered what the line to never cross is, here are part of those things you should never compromise for the sake of relationship:
1. Boundaries
There are boundaries that need to be set in every relationship. What you'll take and what you won't. Some boundaries are off limits and cannot be encroached, there are personal, positive values you hold tightly and should not let go of. You absolutely have to express this before the relationship begins or before you go too far into it and experience a lot of misunderstandings.
Knowing, understanding and respecting these boundaries helps the relationship run smoothly, helps you avoid conflicts and makes you both look like a match made in heaven.
And most importantly, it makes you retain your identity. You won't have to feel like you gave up too much of yourself just to make the man or woman stay, or to make the relationship work.
Engage only on things, and be with only people that make you happy, and make you feel comfortable with yourself.
Do only things, and be with only people that make you happy, and make you feel comfortable with yourself.
2. Your self-respect
Can there be love and happy relationships without respect? It is highly impossible for a relationship to last or be happy when one partner does not understand how respect works, or shows an unwillingness to live by it.
If you are with someone who shows regular signs of disrespect, don’t try to make excuse for them. It's probably just going to get worse. Do not live with constant, intentional disrespect for the sake of a relationship. Because, really, is it even a relationship if it lacks mutual respect?
Also don't beg to be loved. It is never worth it.
If your partner regularly disrespects you, you need to address it. Disrespect is not something to compromise on, really.
If your partner regularly disrespects you, you need to address it. Disrespect is not something to compromise on, really.
3. Great friendships
Never let go of great friendships because of a relationship and try to call it compromise.
The healthy, productive friends you've had before should be kept. They have their space and roles in your life and your partner has to get used to that.
If you're with someone who tries to block all the great friendships you have, that's a red flag you shouldn’t ignore.
4. Dreams
Your long-held dreams and aspirations are valid and deserve to be actualised. Don't give them up for the sake of a relationship.
5. Your family
Nothing, I repeat nothing should make you want to give that up. No one should make you give up your family.
Ematabs78 2 yrs 54
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Ematabs78
Reasons To Break Away From A Relationship
~3.5 mins read
Reasons to break away from a relationship
The joy of initiating a relationship is not as sweet as the joy derived from it if it works out, marital joy is in short supply today because many has entered into regrettable marriages which is an offshoot of a toxic relationship.
Meanwhile, many regrets and weeping in marriage would have been avoided if the people involved are vigilant enough to notice the traces of an imminent trouble while in courtship, Instead of experimenting hell in marriage, it is better to break a bad courtship now.
To be frank, breaking a relationship is a serious emotional task that may have a devastating effect on you if not handled very well, but a broken courtship is better than a broken marriage.
A great marriage is not something that just happens, it must be created.
Save yourself of marital trauma by calling it quit if you notice any of these signs:*
1.Distance from God:
God is the inventor of marriage, He knows how to make it work. So, he must be the foundation for it to be fulfilling and rewarding. If you're in a relationship with someone that's not having personal relationship with God, not born again, sees nothing special in attending church or studying the Bible, you need to step on your vehicle brake and stop it instantly.
Although, he or she may not stop you from attending church programs now, but it is a sign of danger to come ahead, because any heart free from divine influence will be influenced by Satan. It is a deadly risk to hang on with an unbeliever in a relationship.
If he or she is not serious with God, such fellow will give you serious headache in your marriage.
Loosing your peace:
If you noticed that you're not your real self whenever you're with your partner, always acting emotionally imbalance and afraid of your partner's reaction to whatever you say or do, you bottled your emotions, reactions, opinions in the presence of your spouse, you're panicked about being judged by him or her, you're not free to express yourself and you feel frustrated in the presence of your partner, that means you're in a controlling relationship. For such to work in marriage, that means you must be a mumu in that union.
3.Always putting you down:
Being in a relationship with someone that always puts you down, destroy your self-esteem and making you feel like a nonentity is a reason to think of backing out. Is he or she fond of insulting you, calling you names and embarrassing you in the public ? To him or her, you're always wrong, you can't please him or her no matter how you try?
You had better be sincere with yourself now and walk away lest you regret in marriage .
4.Twin Game :
Twin games is when your partner is seeing someone else apart from you and the heart is divided between two people. Anyone that's not having 100% love for you in courtship is not trustworthy, don't allow such to waste your time.
Before he or she breaks your heart, be fast enough to give him or her a red card.
5.If he or she Keep putting you in the shadow:
Beware of that fellow that keeps you and the relationship in the dark by not allowing people to know that you're in a relationship and not introducing you to his or her parents, family members, pastor, mentor and friends.
Introducing to people that matters in his or her life is a sign of total commitment to the relationship, but if you have being in a relationship for a while without been introduced to people that matters, it is a sign that something is fishy.
6.Are You Troubled?
There is no fear in love; but perfect love casteth out fear, because fear hath torment. "He that feareth is not made perfect in love" I John 4:18-20
Are you worried about his or her behaviours when you are not together? Is your heart bombard with anxiety that something is not right with this fellow?
When you have lost relationship excitement, full of doubts or emotionally drained, take time out to pray for God to reveal the secret things about him or her to you.
7.Frequent Quarrels :
Frequent quarrels in a relationship is a dangerous signal revealing that both of you are not friends, it takes friendliness to build in a successful relationship. Whenever you're with your partner, he or she picked up an offence at every slightest opportunity to the point that you keep malice, report to friends and families before you can settle.
Beware! It is a pointer to problematic marriage of tomorrow.
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