Inside The Mind Of A Rapist: My personal experience about rape

 

All over the social media, newspaper and television, there has been repeated cases of rape rising on a daily basis and the sad news about these similar reports are the children that fall victims of the situation. Children of different age,ranging from 5 months, 1 year and above that are not quite matured or knowledgeable of whatever thing that's happening in their environment left alone knowing what it means to be raped. I feel really bad whenever I get to hear some of these stories, It gets me wondering what the world is turning into. 

People in their right state of mind destroying the lives of innocent young ones that are yet to grow. A lot cross my mind when I hear these stories, I think about the pain, the trauma and most importantly the brokenness left mind. Growing with such horrific experience is not quite easy to deal with especially when you lose your virginity through that process to total stranger. Seriously, thinking about it is depressing because the scar is always there no matter how long it has been. This leads to a lot damage in the person's personality whether male or female.

 

Adolescents worldwide often face tremendous sexual violence, a growing problem with traumatic experience. This has a long term impact on the health of victims, including physical injuries, emotional problems ( stress disorders, depression) and sexual dysfunction. It also leads to stigmatization of victims, sometimes  resulting in rejection by families, friends and communities. There is no day in the country without a reported case of sexual violence especially rape in the media. Despite the rising cases of rape in Nigeria, there seems to be no end to the nemesis.

With current campaigns against rape and other forms of sexual abuse in the country, the state needs to rise to the occasion and deal with it.

 

Inside the mind of a Rapist

Audu Marfo Stephen

One of the most ignored causes of rape is pornography and here is why. There are so many types of porn content out there but what they do have in common is violence, resistance and submission. Nowadays, it is very rare to find porn content excluding all the above mentioned. I am saying this as a 16-year-old boy who has explored porn for some time now.

 

“Jack, an 11-year-old boy who was exposed to pornographic content and has been watching it for a very long time now. Jack’s porno addiction started when he was 12 and he is now 24 meaning Jack has been addicted to porn for about 12 years. During the 12 years of active porn experience, he has watched different types of porn. Some which are quite extreme and questionable like child pornography and many more because the old stuff was boring to Jack. Is society safe if Jack is around?”

 

People who get exposed to porn at an early age think that’s how sex works. They think the violence, submission and aggression are what happen in real life not knowing that it is all just at an act. The probability that Jack has had sex is quite high but the probability that what he sees in pornographic movies is what he is getting is low. To Jack women are object and there most obey if they don’t let them which leads to aggressiveness he sees being put into practices. A person like Jack plans their victims if they match what he watches and then he attacks. When the victim is resisting or in pain crying its part of the enjoyment (since most porn content shows that males should enjoy abusing females). Jack is not supposed to feel sorry because in the videos the males are not sorry but having fun.

 

Porn program the minds of the masses in sicking ways than what you can imagine. I know that porn is sometimes recommended by a therapist but that is not the same kind of porn that the “next generation” is watching. If law enforcement wants to minimize rape cases, access to porn not being easy should be one of the first steps. How women dress per my understanding is just an excuse for rape but not the cause

 

 

My personal experience about rape.

 

It happened in school when I was in my second year(200 level). I went to visit a friend at ifite tho we weren't close enough because he was trying to woo me then but I wasn't interested and I felt we are better off as friends that's if we actually are. I met in school library where he was working then while I was in 100 level so we later became friends and that was when I knew he was in  Engineering final year . We didn't really talk much after I went to visit him in his logde for the first time which was when I met his younger brother that stays with him because he was around with his friend at my arrival.  I started avoiding him a bit because he was pestering me with when next am I coming to visit him which I know there was no next time. I find it very difficult to visit someone in school left alone seeing a guy, I mean that's like a big deal for me so I kept on giving excuses here and there just to make sure his plans didn't. Fortunately, for me I mistakenly met him inside school and that period was when we were preparing for our second year examination and general studies exams were on going that same period too. He approached me and I couldn't avoid him rather than to greet him back and respond to his usual talks. He asked me to follow him to his place and I said no because I have plans already for day besides I came to school for a reason so I can't just abandon them and follow you for what. He said I was whining him and kind of dragged me to enter bus with him inside school but I kept insisting that I wasn't going to ifite unless it's next time so when the bus got to bus stand by then my mood has changed and I told him I wasn't coming down from the bus after awhile of trying to convince me he said ok let's go back inside school which was where I was going. We entered Keke back to MPH, he was like I should give him one of my belongings since I said I was going to come next time just to make sure I did come. I had to agree to make it seem like I was serious and I gave him my glasses but deep down I didn't really want to come see him and he knows just that I was tired of his repeated talks.  When I was done with my plans for the day in school, I thought about going that the same to avoid procrastination so I decided to call him to let him know that I was coming because I needed to get my glasses (medicated glasses)  back before going back to my hostel. We met at ifite then went together to his lodge, I guess that was the 3rd time I was visiting his place. We talked a bit before asking for my glasses because I didn't want to stay long and I wasn't that comfortable with him besides I planned not to stay long which was part of the reason why I came in the evening so I would say is late and I should start going but I didn't know he had a hidden agenda for me that day. He was delaying giving me my glasses saying he will still give it to me and that was pissing me off and I already told me that I want to going home to rest because I was coming from school to see him, at least I kept to my words. He was keen on making a conversation with me which I wasn't interested in, telling me to rest there on his bed since am tired so I suddenly got angry that I wanted to go and said that I will leave without my glasses if he doesn't want to give it to me. To cut the story short, I think he got angry at me too and dragged me on his bed, started touching me all over and was tried pulling my clothes, I was wearing trousers and blouse. I started begging him to stop, that I was sorry to whatever wrong I have done to him that I want to write my exams in peace but he need dear ears to all I was saying and told me that I was very stubborn, he will teach me a lesson, it seems like if he was begging me I will be doing shakara for him. I started shouting help to know if the neighbors will hear, he stood up to lock his room door, I ran to the balcony and jumped from the 4th floor to the 3rd floor of that building. While I was jumping he noticed and held me to pull me up... Check out my YouTube channel @Constance Adione for this video to get the full story of what happened to me. 

 

 

 

Adione Constance