There are those periods in your life where you know you're totally different from your regular self. 

Where there is the presence of that detached, meaningless fog where you can't feel anything about anything - even the things you love. 

And you just want to be curled up inside your little cubicle and shut yourself away from all the noise of the world.

Where you're silently fighting unseen demons that no one else sees. 

So, you pray to gradually fade away just to take a rest from those battles.

The most painful part is that people would think you don't want to talk to them, when in reality - you're somewhere in between you-don't-understand and I-can't-explain. 

Lol. How do you explain what is on your mind when you cannot even understand it yourself?

People don't know how it's not easy to live in a body that fights to survive with a mind that tries to die. 

I have been feeling way worse, recently. My mental health is currently at zero. 

I want to take a long break, but I'm on several projects that I cannot abandon for now.

It keeps eating me so deep and plunging me into the deepest darkness that even motivational words do not make me feel better. 

Tears don't even come anymore. 

The only reason I try to hang on everytime is because I don't want to hurt people who genuinely care about me. 

The only reason I try to hang on is because I know there are millions of people who are going through worse, and are still hanging on while hoping. 

The only reason I try to hang on is because I might feel better tomorrow. 

But, how long would I keep hanging on? How long?

©BodaGiguu

And keep faking smiles

Switching mood

Just to prove to the world you are good.

Why do you keep replacing the frown

Even when you are hurt deep down?

Wiping your tears

And ignoring your fears?

No one understand, who cares?

Who knows the battles and nightmares?

The struggles of the broken

Who feels dejected and forsaken.

Faith is as thin as chances of survival

Regret your arrival

This battle is way more bigger that your strength

More reason to plea for last breath.

Through it all.. you keep pushing,hoping, living, surviving..

Struggling, praying,trying, striving..

It's not easy,never has, never is, never would..

But you keep trying.. doing what you think you should.

You've gone a long way to consider quitting

The trophy isn't far,just keep fighting.

You can pull through,you can,you will!

Favourjae ????