I know you guys say that honesty doesn't have to be brutal but then I can't help being blunt most of the time.

I watched my parents argue over who is giving me #250 to make my hair one Sunday evening and the memory is almost laughable as much as it angers me.

Now my mom is not best description of easy going. She would stamp her feet, beat her chest, hit the table and yell out her lungs to show her disagreement. But this man called my daddy is the ultimate charmer. God! He would never yell or argue, he'll nod at you, smile at you but he's setting his feet so that he wouldn't budge then leave your presence dropping your mandate to do what he wants. I am talking about a man who you should never get into a fight with cos nobody would believe he asked for it. He's affability could win anybody, and I mean anybody. 

But then there's something about my Dad's tightfisted money policy that doesn't allow for a peaceful home. Funnily my Dad doesn't call this stinginess he sees it as frugality. My mum goes out sees anything that she thinks might fit you and buys it for you without blinking but my dad would not buy anything he hadn't put into budget 10 days ago. No impulse spending.

My parents are the sweetest until when anything involving money is involved. All their argument is about money. This is not an issue until my mum starts feeling like she's bearing all responsibility and my dad's unwillingness to give anything more than he planned to.

As I was saying my mum refused to give me that #250 cos she was very upset and very strong willed if she say no it means no. And the next day was Monday morning school day. My hair wasn't made and my mom insisted I wouldn't leave the house to school with my hair like that. See my papa love school, he doesn't joke with school else he would have ignored her and go to work but still rather than he giving me #250 my loving father went to his pocket brought out a new razor and shaved me like a widow. Twice it happened to me. I grew up preferring my mum to my dad for many reasons and resenting my mum again for many reasons my Dad is better than her.

Now that i am grown up and choose to be the jack sparrow of my Caribbean. You say I dey form ? No ooo I just know the kind of person I want to spend my life with. 

While some people deal with a measure of stinginess some people are afflicted by it.

While some deal with a level of I said what I said some people are afflicted by it.

Struggle is when opposite attract. Frustration is when the irresistible force meets the immovable object. And that is just some marriages. A really determined person couples with "nah so God want am". One is disgusted by the I no go rest attitude which he might call busybody and the other is irritated by the let the sleeping dog lie attitude even though the dog is laying on your Sunday clothes of the other too. It would require so much patience and tolerance for problems not to arise in such home. 

Though we are different people so certainly we must create room for compromises. 

Tolerating and correcting one another in kindness. We create the kind of atmosphere we want in our homes.

An atmosphere where love can thrive no matter what.

Back forward into the centuries. Virgin marriage used to be the norm. Young girls and boys were expected to keep themselves until married to explore their sexual fantansies. 

But now nobody checks that. You can have sex with anyone at any time. This is a generation where anybody gets a chance with anybody and nothing is off culture anymore.

Then we see men who move from one man's bed to another and women who change men like under wears.

No matter how we try to justify such acts we cannot but admit that it has something to do with their own selfishness and greedy desires. This is where self control comes in.

Sexual urge is like a fire that cannot burn out but it is left for each individual to find ways to control this inferno else it burns everything down to ashes.

Are you surprised? Sex tape blackmail here and there. Sex scandals here and there. Sex have been weaponised and you can not tell what a person's mission in your life is these days.

But public opinion is that once a man or woman is married, their Partners can help them control their urge to sleep around. Do you agree with it?

Well I do not because if they couldn't control themselves when single marriage is not a cage that is strong enough to hold them.

Divorce rate is out of control, women denying their husbands sex and men not satisfied with their wives.

As they keep sleeping around, their minds are introduced to heightened levels of sexual fantansies and once your mind have reached such level, it will be difficult to settle with a partner that cannot go beyond that level. That is where cheating starts from.

Now you see this man who got married barely a year ago is calling an ex and this lady who already has a child for her husband is warming the bed of a past lover. 

Having multiple partners is a road to self destruct but at first it appears like pleasure.

Practicing self-control is currently to lust and not marriage.