I know so many of us come from homes where love is shared and respect comes easy.

We learn how that love is the common denominator for all which most be held sacred from our family which was our very first influence as children.

That's is wonderful. But now we are in this world. Where we see that things are not the way we thought they were. The outside is completely different from what we were taught inside. We have been taught to help people, and in our families when we help people they are grateful to us and everyone is joyful. But on the outside world when we help people they tend to want to take advantage of us and everyone sees us as arrogant when we try to question their actions.

Slowly we are letting their bad behaviors get to us, people like to you but you ignore it. Or better still we look for how to excuse their bad behavior and say "oh! Maybe he's having a bad day"

We see that on this outside people will talk to you and talk about you, thesame people will lie to you and lie about you. And somehow something is burning out in the inside of us and we are quickly loosing it. We can not take it anymore.

Then we conclude that the best thing to do is to get away from them. First, we stop being nice. That love that we learn at home that we have carried everywhere with us we start to drop it and begin to pick up learned behaviors.

We say we are trying to sheild ourselves from the cold outside but in reality we are becoming like the people outside, vicious creatures.

We think we are making progress because since we took on these attitudes, we have not suffered anymore injury from people. Since we started behaving this way, we have not a single tear drop from our eyes. 

At this point, we do not figure our that something is wrong. That we are slowly changing form like the prince who turns into an monster at night.

We feel okay and we feel the need to be more like this. Only if we would take a moment and ask ourselves.

If we say we are in our best season then why are we so unhappy?

And if we say we have peace of mind then why are where did the smile on the faces of those around us go when they see us?

It doesn't bother us that people notice that we have changed. Infact we tell them to get out and call them kill joy until one time the night comes and we see our reflection in the mirror and we get terrified.

When did I become like this ? How did I get to this point of my life? We scream these questions.

The night season is that time in our life where we want to escape from ourselves. If a man remains who he is in that moment he is authentic and true to himself and has good in him.

It is the night season that turns virgins to sex addicts and strippers. It is the night season that turns teenagers to drug users. It is the night season that turns victims to villians. It is the night season that make a perceived good man a liar and a thief.

There are men who change at night.

But isn't it true that we can only become who we are inside? Didn't we grow up wearing our hearts on our sleeves? Didn't we walk the street and feed a homeless dog? Didn't we see the hood Gangstars and say "Godforbid, never?" 

Didn't we spit at people who caused others pain? Then how are now now thesame people we despise?

It is hard to endure the cold outside so we start devicing means to preserve ourselves. We didn't even care if the fire we made to keep us warm is the fire burning the house of another man. If what is saving us is taking the lives and comfort of others do not bother us.

We just want to live. And of what use is living, living long unhappy life?

Many of us changed at night and since then we have no hope neither do we look to seeing the sun again.

We have so much loved the dark that we sync with it. But this is not us, these are habits we picked along the way, these are learned behaviors that we have adapted and fit into our lives that it already looks like ours.

We must relearn kindness, hope and charity. That another man's pain is not our gain and even though no one can measure the depth of another person's pain nor suffering we must try to relate with them and see with their eyes and feel with their skins. Life is perspective and everyone operates on his own level of understanding. We should not rely on the courts of public opinion to jugde the life and character of others. Walk in their shoes and know why they did what they did. It will guide you on how to set healthy boundaries for them not the type of boundaries that end up destroying everything beautiful and cause the light to dim.

If you self-examine yourself and find anything not yours drop it in the gutters outside. 

Be who you are regardless.

Back forward into the centuries. Virgin marriage used to be the norm. Young girls and boys were expected to keep themselves until married to explore their sexual fantansies. 

But now nobody checks that. You can have sex with anyone at any time. This is a generation where anybody gets a chance with anybody and nothing is off culture anymore.

Then we see men who move from one man's bed to another and women who change men like under wears.

No matter how we try to justify such acts we cannot but admit that it has something to do with their own selfishness and greedy desires. This is where self control comes in.

Sexual urge is like a fire that cannot burn out but it is left for each individual to find ways to control this inferno else it burns everything down to ashes.

Are you surprised? Sex tape blackmail here and there. Sex scandals here and there. Sex have been weaponised and you can not tell what a person's mission in your life is these days.

But public opinion is that once a man or woman is married, their Partners can help them control their urge to sleep around. Do you agree with it?

Well I do not because if they couldn't control themselves when single marriage is not a cage that is strong enough to hold them.

Divorce rate is out of control, women denying their husbands sex and men not satisfied with their wives.

As they keep sleeping around, their minds are introduced to heightened levels of sexual fantansies and once your mind have reached such level, it will be difficult to settle with a partner that cannot go beyond that level. That is where cheating starts from.

Now you see this man who got married barely a year ago is calling an ex and this lady who already has a child for her husband is warming the bed of a past lover. 

Having multiple partners is a road to self destruct but at first it appears like pleasure.

Practicing self-control is currently to lust and not marriage.