“Give him a crew cut.” The barber did just that, and so help me, I found I’d been bringing up somebody else’s son!

I’ve got a 16-year-old son who was 6' 3'' until he got a haircut. Now he is 5' 8''.

The customer settled himself and let the barber put the towel around him. Then he told the barber, “Before we start, I know the weather’s awful. I don’t care who wins the next big fight, and I don’t bet on the horse races. I know I’m getting thin on top, but I don’t mind. Now get on with it.”

“Well, sir, if you don’t mind,” said the barber, “I’ll be able to concentrate better if you don’t talk so much!”

A man entered a barber shop and said, “I am tired of looking like everyone else! I want a change! Part my hair from ear to ear!”

“Are you sure?”

“Yes!” said the man.

The barber did as he was told and a satisfied customer left the shop.

Three hours passed and the man reentered the shop. “Put it back the way it was,” he said.

“What’s the matter?” asked the barber. “Are you tired of being a nonconformist already?”

“No,” he replied, “I’m tired of people whispering in my nose!”

Customer (twice nicked by the barber’s razor):

Hey, barber, gimme a glass of water.

Barber: What’s wrong, sir? Hair in your mouth?

Customer: No, I want to see if my neck leaks.

Q: What are there a lot of when turkeys play baseball?

A: Fowl balls.

Q: Where do pencils go for vacation?

A: Pencil-vania.

Q: What did the snowman order at Wendy’s®?

A: A Frosty!

Q: Why can’t skeletons play music?

A: Because they have no organs.

Q: How do you catch an unusual rabbit?

A: Unique up on it.

Q: What’s the best way to talk to a T-Rex?

A: From a distance.

Q: What kind of music do mummies like best?

A: Wrap.

Q: Why did the elephant cross the road?

A: Because it was the chicken’s day off.

Q: Where can you learn to make ice cream?

A: At Sundae School.

Q: Where can you learn to make ice cream?

A: At Sundae School.

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Culled from 200 kid-friendly Joke from the classroom