A few years ago, my friend had just crossed age 50.  Just about 8 days later she was struck with an ailment ... And she died swiftly.

In the group we received a condolence message  that smsaid ..."Sad .. she is no more with us"...  *RIP* 🙏

Two months later I called her husband. A thought crossed my mind ..he must be devastated as he had a travelling job. Till her death she would oversee everything.. home.. education of their children... Taking care of the aged in-laws.. their sickness.. managing relatives..   _*everything,  everything, everything*_ 

She would express at times.." my house needs my time, .. my hubby cant even make coffee tea, my family needs me for everything, but no one cares or appreciates the efforts  i put in. I feel they all take me for granted ".

I called her husband to see if the family needed any support, as, i felt her  hubby must be feeling lost.. to suddenly have to handle  all the  responsibilities,  for evetything.. aging parents, Kids, his travelling job, loneliness at this age.. how must he be managing?

The cell phone rang for some time..no response... After an hour he returned the call.. He apologised that he could not answer my call..as he  had started playing tennis for an hour at his club and meeting friends etc. To ensure he had a good time.

 He even took a transfer to Pune. So as not to travel anymore.

"All well at home? " I asked, 

He replied, he had appointed a cook .. he paid her a little more and she would buy the groceries and provisions. He had appointed *full time caretakers* for his aging parents.

 "Managing well...kids are fine. Life is returning to normalcy...he said.

I barely managed to say a couple of sentences and we hung up.

Tears welled up my eyes.

My friend remained in my thoughts... She had missed the school reunion for a minor ailment of her mother in law. She had miss her nieces wedding because she had to supervise the repair  work in her house.

She had missed so many  fun parties and movies because her children had exams she had to cook she had to take care of her husband's needs...

She had Always looked for some appreciation and some recognition.. which she never got.

Today I feel like telling her..

No one is indispensable.

And no one will be missed.. it is just the play of our mind.

Perhaps it is the consolation.. A symbol of our understanding if you would like to call it that... That's the problem of putting others first.

You have taught them that YOU COME SECOND 

 *Reality bites* :

 _After her death *two more maids* were hired and the house was in order_

We only measure our respect and our value.. ain't that true?

Then do enjoy life.. Remove the frame of mind that I am indispensable and without me the house will suffer..🙏

🧕🏼👮🏻‍♀️🤱🏻👩🏼‍🎓👩🏻‍🔬 🙎🏻‍♀️👱🏻‍♀️👩🏻‍🦱 🧑🏻‍🦱👩🏻‍💻👵🏻

💟 🆘 🚺 My message to all Ladies : 

Most importantly make time for *yourself* .. the *ME* time.. the time for the self..🏃🏼‍♀️ 🚶🏻‍♀️

❤️ Get in touch with your girlfriends... Talk, laugh and enjoy

🧡 Live your passion, live your life  🎧🎻 💃🏻🚲 🎤🎼🎶 🚴🏻‍♀️🎨

💛 Once in a while do things that love to do ...

🏃🏽‍♀️🧎🏻‍♀️🤳🏼🧘🏻‍♀️🎼 🛀🏾 📝 🎨🖌️ 🎸🎹♟️🎲🎳 

💙 Don't look for your happiness in others, *you too deserve some happiness* because if you are not happy you cannot make others happy 🤩😃

💚 Everyone needs you, and you too need your own care and love 🙇🏻‍♀️💆🏻‍♀️💅🏼👯🏻‍♀️ 🧎🏻‍♀️🚶🏻‍♀️🏃🏽‍♀️

💜 Women should come forward to help and guide other women who are unable to handle their personal stress and give them a hand to uplift their confidence 🤗👩🏻‍🦱

🤎 💖Let us HELP Ourselves and make this *LIFE WORTHWHILE* 💝 

💓 we all have only one life to live ❣️

"She's so beautiful, she can sing very well and she works at the Central Bank of Nigeria. Lord, that's the kind of woman I want for a wife. Lord, please give me Juliana for a wife. We can do the ministry together", he lamented. 

"My son, you don't see what I'm seeing. She's not meant for you" saith the Lord". That was God's message to John through his friend.

John refused and was still bent on marrying Juliana. Few months after their marriage, John was no where to be found. His family searched every where, all to no avail. More than fifteen years on, John and Juliana were still no where to be found. 

Bottom line: Juliana was on an assignment from satanic kingdom to destroy the destiny of a man that eventually marries her. 

*This story happened to someone very close to me.* 

There are some marriage intention God will specifically object to. It's not to hurt you but to protect you. Some people who are regretting today in their marriages, perhaps were warned of God not to marry the person they married. One thing with God is that He will leave you to your choice; but it consequences you will bear. 

*The love you have for that person is not as strong as God's love and purpose for you, which are the best.* So my beloved; when God says no, JUST OBEY! Though it might be challenging but it will pay off. Just obey!

*MEDITATION:* Am I struggling with God's will?

*PRAYER:* Father, help me obey Your will for my marital choice in Jesus name, Amen.

*CONFESSION:* I back out of every relationship that is not God's will for my life in Jesus name, Amen.