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So after my main Facebook account was disabled last year, I bounced between the 2 sub accounts I opened trying to recover as many old friends and followers from my original profile as possible.

One sunny afternoon on one of my now disabled sub accounts, Facebook popped a friend suggestion of this strikingly pretty female with somewhat gothic make-up and hair preference.

It drew my attention.

I love weird and divergent, so naturally I was interested in getting to know this Nigerian lady that had the vibe of a European rock star. Lol.

I sent a request.

Slid into DM and was received warmly.

In no time we started rolling like a house on fire and eventually decided to move our new found friendship to whatsapp.

Then...... I made a brave venture.

I requested we have a voice call for the first time.

She accepted and we conversed for over 30 minutes on WhatsApp voice until she had to go off to attend to work.

I want to stress at this point that the voice on the other end of the line was NOT the voice of a man transitioning into a woman.

It was the voice of a woman fully confident about her femininity!

No sane, heterosexual man would listen to such a voice and not have goosebumps in their intestines over the soothing quality.

The pitch, the tone, the almost mellifluous timbre– nothing about it was in anyway suggestive of a voice that ever had baritone– never mind even being male.

In growing mortification as I type this, I wail to admit that I was on the highway towards FALLING for this lady whose voice exuded the confidence of Cher and the undaunted command of Adichie Chimmamanda.

I couldn't wait for our next WhatsApp conversation.

I was in Lagos. She was in Abuja. Ooh lala.... what was that notorious recitation wise men made about the mountain moving to Mohammed if Mohammed couldn't make it to the mountain?

Ok.

The very next time we chatted on WhatsApp, we went deeper.

Discussed experiences, perspectives and meandered into the ideologies that formed and informed us.

One thing led to the other before the 'ultimate question' surfaced:

'So Ivan what's your stance on the LGBT movement.'

It was her asking.

I'm an honest and non-political person, and without flinching I told her how the LGBT struggle was the least of my worries as I felt that the world had more pressing primary concerns bordering on quality of life and basic survival of the human species to deal with.

She ventured on inquiring what opinions I had about gays, lesbians and transgenders and I explained that everyone had a right to do what they pleased with their own bodies, and that as far as it didn't affect me directly, encroach on my space and sanity or mislead my own offsprings into adopting a sexuality that was biologically unnatural; that I was of the 'live and let live' school of thought.

The only person they were answerable to was their God and their conscience.

About lesbians, I admitted that as a straight guy, I actually did find the mental and visual concept of lovemaking between 2 of the fairest creatures known to living species fascinating and curiously stimulating.

We proceeded to exchanging pictures and all too soon, everywhere became a feisty festival of bartering nice and sweet compliments between ourselves over how beautiful, charming and handsome we both looked. Lol.

We sha discussed on extensively.

Romance seemed to be in the clouds, watching us and purring 'awww' every minute.

 I can't remember whether it was at the point I suggested us getting to meet or something, but a message from her froze me in my tracks.

She asked something like if I've ever been with a transgender or hope I was aware she was a 'trans woman.'

Naturally, I assumed she was just dishing a 'woke' joke and gave some playful response.

She maintained that she WAS A TRANSGENDER WOMAN.

I paused for 2 minutes.

Just to be sure and to feed the denial in my head, I asked the most foolish question imaginable.

Do you mean you were born a female, but surgically transitioned to a male or you were born a male, but surgically transitioned into a female?

She calmly replied that she was born a MAN but transitioned to a WOMAN a few years ago.

My world froze.

And began crumbling. FAST.

My mouth forgot to close.

She, sensing my astonishment proceeded to send me a series of video interviews she had with BBC pidgin narrating her journey and experience as a trans woman living in Nigeria and dealing with rejection from family.

I was shocked.

Shocked to learn that transgender surgeries and procedures actually happen in Nigeria.

I used to assume that Nigerians who did that travelled abroad to do it.

I was even more shocked to learn that there were transgender communities in major cities like Lagos and Abuja, and they even held events, meetings and embarked on community development projects.

But beyond being shocked, I was thankful for her honesty.

Trust me when I say that the most devastating thing you can do to a straight man is put him in a situation where he gets into any form of sexual entanglement with a human assigned male at birth who later surgically transitioned into a woman.

In our heads, we consider it HOMOSEXUALITY– no matter how you may want to rationalize it going by today's LGBT ideologies.

The famous Scottish James Bond screen legend, Sean Connery almost went violent and sued an entire production crew after he discovered that a particular actress that played a kissing scene with him was trans-woman.

In his words, he found it unforgivable that he was deceived into kissing a fellow man as himself on the screen for entertainment.

Dear Mx Ella David-ette ...... I just remembered our brief interaction on WhatsApp last year today.

Thankyou for being honest.

My experience conversing with you really showed the level of experience, tolerance, love for humanity and empathy I have attained from this life.

Ivan of 4 years ago would have reacted in a manner that would have made you feel like a circus freak.

But Ivan of today understands the diversity of life better.

I am not a subscriber of the LGBT movement.

But the live and let live commission supercedes everything else.

Above all, whatever makes you happy and feel on top of the world when you wake each morning is worth pursuing, I guess.

I do not subscribe to the philosophy behind surgically modifying a human body of a particular gender into another. 

I feel it is unnatural.

But I respect your honesty in informing me before we went further.

I also respect that this is your reality and know that the God that created you in the form and gender of his choosing still loves you!

Do have a fantastic weekend!

      Credits:   ∆Ivan The Machine