*ANGER MANAGEMENT RULES FOR COUPLES*

*Note*:the following rules are not only for the marrieds but the singles are also included, family members take them seriously‼️‼️‼️‼️

1. Know that anger is a normal and human emotion

2. Know the temperament of your spouse and yourself. Are you or your spouse hot tempered, or slow to anger? This will equip you on how to better handle yourself and your spouse

3. Do not get comfortable using curse words and insults; if you do, most likely you will use those hurtful words when you are angry. Decide that your tongue will be clean even when aggravated. It is so painful to have a spouse who tells you "F*ck you", "Stupid", "Whore"; such cursing and insults are hard to heal from when they are coming from your spouse

4. When you or your spouse are angry, learn to keep quiet or walk away. Refrain from talking lest you say something hard to take back 

5. Even as you walk away, keep the channel of communication open. Don't turn off your phone or run away with no way to reach you

6. Never hurt your spouse because you feel hurt by spouse. Revenge leads to more mess, hurt and deterioration. Be the bigger person

7. Resolve issues quickly. Sit down and have a candid talk no matter how painful it is

8. Develop a culture of touch. Touching each other: A hug, a gentle rub on the hand or back, a hold at the waist; this warms up your loving spouse to you

9. Pray. In the midst of your anger, pray. In the midst of your spouse's anger, pray. Prayer moves people

10. Play worship music. Worship God. A spirit that loves God will be calmed down in an environment of worship

11. Remember the bigger picture. When you are angry, it is easy to focus on the current emotion; but don't forget just how far you and your spouse have come from. Don't throw away a love so good out of a moment of anger

12. Double, triple check the decisions you make when angry. In fact, refrain from making decisions when anger. Angry decisions often lead to regret

13. Go out of your way to please your spouse. Do a gesture to your spouse that shows care and affection; cook, serve your spouse, give your spouse a gift, do the chores, leave a loving note for your spouse

14. In the moment of anger, tell your spouse "I love you", even if your spouse will not say it back. At that moment, alot of assurance is needed. Love is not based on feelings but your commitment and truth

15. Find it in you to forgive and to ask for forgiveness, be easy to love. The sooner you do so, the better life will be

16. Keep off throwing things or becoming physically violent. Mature people don't cause physical harm

17. No matter what, sleep in the same bedroom and on the same bed. No going to sleep on the sofa or different rooms. When you two get used to isolation from each other, you will drift apart. Have a "I am not going anywhere so we have to work things out" attitude.

Does and Don't in Relationship

avoid the following mistakes in your relationship.

1. Don't fall in love too quickly. Don't meet someone today and fall in love with him or her immediately. You will be deceived by infatuation and lust. Love grows gradually.

2. Don't have sex too quickly in a new relationship. If you can abstain completely, it is better.

3. If you are a lady, don't demand for money or recharge card from a new guy you just met newly. It doesn't make sense at all. And don't give him all your family problems to solve for you. Our girls need to stop this nonsense in this year.

4. If you are a guy, don't under rate a lady that accepts to date you. Appreciate her.

5. If you are a lady, don't live together with your boyfriend in his house. Spending the night with him should stop this year.

6. Don't force yourself to date or love a person who is not interested in you or no longer shows interest. Love should be reciprocated.

7. Relationship is a choice and be done happily. Don't enslave yourself in a relationship. If you can't find happiness in it, then quit it.

8. Don't say yes to anyone simply because you want to forget all your pains and sorrow. You might get hurt again....

9. Run away from a violent relationship. Don't waste your time trying to fix what can't work. You can't be compatible with anybody you meet. There are some people that you can never blend with no matter how much you try to make the relationship work.

10. As a lady, don't under rate any guy who approaches you for friendship. He may not be what you think. Physical appearance can deceive someone. So don't judge him by his appearance. Study him for sometime before you decide to turn down his offer or not.

11. Contribute meaningfully to your relationship, either you are a guy or lady. Sex is not a contribution. It is wrong to offer sex as your contribution to your relationship. Some ladies make this mistake.

12. Don't cheat on each other.

13. Don't make money your reason for dating someone

14. Sex should not be your reason for dating.

15. Don't be a monitor your partners going and coming. Because monitoring his or her movements may lead to something else.

16. Don't listen to what others people say about your relationship or bringing a third party to your home. Most people don't like it.

17. Don't be too shy to say sorry. Even if you are not at fault still say sorry to make peace. Saying sorry doesn't make you stupid or Foolish. If he or she loves you the way you do, he or she will say sorry too... Learn to say sorry to each other..

18. Always do things together. A heart that fights and play together stays together....

19. Learn to keep your ego and pride aside when it comes to your relationship... Because ego and pride will not build a loving home.. What ever will be will be if it's mine it will surely come to me, no that's the voice of foolishness. What ever will be will not be.

20. Learn to Drop that word all men are the same, all women are the same. No. Don't use it because your relationship with A did not work to look at B. No one is perfect yes. But try to build your home..