I have a concept that I made up called “Super Beliefs.” Super Beliefs are beliefs that are so big and abstract that they encompass all other beliefs and experiences that could potentially contradict them. As a result, Super Beliefs cannot be proven or disproven, since all experience falls under their umbrella.

Whether we realize it or not, we all have our own Super Beliefs. They’re incredibly common. And we tend to cling to them as though our lives depended on it.

“Everything happens for a reason,” is a Super Belief. It’s so all-encompassing that it can explain every single thought or idea you have in response to it. Therefore, it’s impossible to ever disprove it or show contrary evidence to it.

“Something is only true if there is evidence to support it,” is another Super Belief. “God has a plan for everyone,” is another. “We are all spiritually connected and one with the universe,” is another.

“We all live in a computer-generated virtual reality and are enslaved by machines,” is another super belief. Any argument proposed against it will simply reinforce it. If I try to point out that there’s no evidence that this is a hyper-realistic form of virtual reality, someone can just say, “Yeah, because the machines programmed it that way.” You either believe it or you don’t. Such are all Super Beliefs.

Super beliefs are so common that they define a lot of our culture. Some believe that people always deserve whatever happens to them, that if they suffer through life it’s because they’re lazy or stupid or just not trying hard enough. Others believe people suffer due to karma — i.e., what goes around comes around. Others believe that people suffer because humans are inherently sinful and God is punishing them for not repenting. These are all common, everyday Super Beliefs that have very real consequences on the social order.

If you look at political beliefs. People on the left tend to believe that people are inherently good and pure and corrupted by the oppressive society around them. People on the right tend to believe that people are inherently selfish and mean and the rules and structure of society are the only things that can save us from ourselves.

As a kind of societal Rorschach test, Super Beliefs explain why two people with completely opposite points of view can witness the same event and both believe that it supports their position. One person may see a homeless man and see them as a person who is oppressed and victimized by society. Another person may see the same homeless man and see a person who has succumbed to his baser instincts and deserves the suffering he’s brought upon himself. Because Super Beliefs can explain all experience, all experience, therefore, reinforces the Super Belief.

Super Beliefs can be benign (“Everything happens for a reason”), useful, (“All knowledge must be verified and tested to be believed”), benevolent (“The meaning of life is to ease the suffering of all living beings”), or just plain fucking mean (“Death to all non-believers!”).

You may not be aware of them at the moment, but you carry Super Beliefs around with you everywhere you go. They are the foundation on which you’ve built your whole understanding of the universe and everything in it. As a result, Super Beliefs are often hard to spot because they feel so obviously true to us that we never think to question them.

But as time goes on, you’ll notice your Super Beliefs, and the super beliefs of others, poking their dirty heads up, derailing reasonable conversations, putting a roadblock up to any discourse or progress. And it’s in those moments where Super Beliefs emerge that they must be challenged.

When people do horrible things, they don’t do it because they’re uncertain in themselves or they feel as though they are wrong or damaged in some way. It’s actually the opposite. People who do horrible things do them because they are so sure in their own moral superiority. They are so confident that they are right and others are wrong that they feel justified in imposing their own beliefs on others through force.

Whether we’re talking about Hitler, Mao, napalming half the South China Sea, or honor killing a Pakistani woman for showing her ankles in public, people who do awful shit do it because they are certain in their own moral righteousness, and that moral righteousness is usually the product of some Super Belief which cannot be verified or concretely challenged.

Jim Jones took people in desperate situations and people with mental illness and convinced them to buy into the Super Belief that he was God and he was their only salvation. From there, as with most cults, it was all downhill. Once the followers buy into that initial Super Belief, then convincing them to give away their possessions, disown their families, or even to move to the jungles of Guyana feels like a no-brainer to them.

Making a tough decision is a brutal process, especially when it feels like your entire life is going to change because of it.

What if I choose the wrong path? And there is no going back?

I don’t want to regret not doing something or doing something I will regret.

The process of choosing can be so painful that it prevents you from deciding at all. You’d rather be stuck in limbo, waiting for someone to make a decision for you or until you get to a breaking point, hitting rock bottom where there are no choices left.

Whether you’re deciding to switch jobs, start your life with someone, have kids, move across the country, you will only experience one choice.

Think of the decisions you’ve made in the past and how each of them led to something else.? Every moment you have lived thus far has led you to this moment, sitting here, reading this blog post, to this sentence.

Period.

Take a few seconds to marinate in that thought.

Time moves forward, consecutively, without stopping.

Then make a decision. There is no right or wrong life decisions, only a decision. You will never be able to experience the exact path that you did not take, even if you decide to choose it after the fact.

Time would have passed; people would have changed.

Environments would have evolved; social landscapes would have transformed.

And most importantly, you would have changed.

Reflect on who you were a month ago, a year ago, 5 years ago…how have you changed?

But really, it doesn’t matter what choice you choose.

Regret is for those who don’t want to or believe they can’t learn from the past.?

The one thing that is certain will happen

During life changes like getting married, getting divorced, starting a relationship, ending one, leaving a job, starting one, moving to a new city…you get to see the true colours of people. It’s like a litmus test for filtering out the authentic relationships from the inauthentic ones.

Be bold! Be brave! Make those scary life decisions. ?

Those who support you and want you to shine will be there, cheering you on. ?Those who can’t stay for your metamorphosis are only holding you back.?
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You do you and your true tribe will appear.