20 Secrets to Living a Happier Life.

There’s an unfortunate reason why happiness is often elusive -- our brains simply aren’t wired that way. Instead, our brains have evolved to survive, to protect ourselves, to keep us safe. Sure, we have moments of elation and periods of contentment and bliss. But many of us are plagued with persistent negative emotions -- we are just plain stuck in the “blahs.”

How do we find more joy in our life? Like anything else, it takes practice to cultivate ongoing happiness. In a sense, we have to reset our baseline. It won't happen overnight, but here are the top 20 things you can do every day to discover the secrets of being happier.

1. Focus on the positive.

To find long-term happiness, you need to retrain your brain from a negative mindset to a positive mindset. Try these things: Spend one to two minutes looking for positives in your life. Do this three times a day for 45 days, and your brain will start doing it automatically.

Choose a positive mantra for the day -- something you will repeat to yourself, such as “Today is beautiful” or “I feel grateful for all I have.” And when things go south, take a moment to try and see it from a positive light. Never underestimate the importance of recognizing the silver linings in life.

2. Celebrate little victories.

Life is full of ups and downs, but in between we have a lot of little victories that go unnoticed. Take a moment to celebrate these small wins.

Did you check off all the things on your to-do list that you’ve been procrastinating on? Yay! Did you finally clear out a thousand emails that have been filling up your inbox? Woohoo! Take pleasure in these little achievements. They add up!

3. Find your work–life balance.

Work takes up a lot of our day, but it shouldn’t be the only thing we do. It’s important to pursue activities and interests beyond our job. Do you have a hobby? Are you spending time with friends and loved ones? Are you getting exercise? Creating balance in your life will reduce stress and give you other outlets to express yourself and have fun

4. Practice mindfulness.

Mindfulness mediation works by bringing your awareness and attention to the present moment. It’s about being nonjudgmental and accepting how you are feeling. Practicing mindfulness means being present, aware and curious. Accepting what we are going through decreases stress and helps us see situations for what they are. Through mindfulness, we can find peace and affirmation in ourselves.

5. Be creative.

You may think of artists as being moody and depressed, but studies show that engaging in creative activities on a regular basis actually makes you happier. Those who spend time using their imagination and being creative have more enthusiasm and are more likely to have feelings of long-term happiness and well-being. Such creative activities can include writing, painting, drawing and musical performance.

6. Accept imperfection.

Many of us strive for perfection -- we desire to push ourselves to be our best. But in order to be truly happy, you must embrace the imperfection that is part of life. Perfection is impossible, and holding ourselves and others to these standards is futile. We will always end up feeling let down. Accept that life is imperfect and recognize that there is beauty and grace in that imperfection.

7. Do what you love.

It’s pretty hard to maintain happiness if you hate your job. Don’t waste the best years of your life in a joyless job, even if it’s paying the bills. What are you interested in? What are you truly passionate about? Focus on building a career in an area that motivates you and will provide you with a high level of satisfaction, and your happiness factor will go up exponentially.

8. Spend wisely.

It’s tempting to believe that the more money you have, the happier you’ll be. But the reality is, it’s how you spend your money that helps you feel happier. The key is to do it wisely. Spending money on experiences -- travel, dining, concerts and so on -- can make us happier because we are sharing those experiences with others. Happiness connected to material possessions fades, but experiences help us define our purpose and passions in life.

9. Live in the moment.

Our thoughts and feelings often revolve around the past or the future. Reality is what you are experiencing in this very moment; what you are going through right now. Sometimes we want to escape that reality. But when we stay in the present, we are fully engaged in our lives. Endeavor to live in the moment, and you’ll begin to have a deeper appreciation for your life.

10. Cultivate gratitude.

Find ways to cultivate gratitude on a daily basis. Giving thanks and being grateful for all you have will make you happier and more content. Gratitude is a thankful appreciation for what you have received in life. Those gifts may be tangible or intangible. When you spend time each day acknowledging all that is good in life, you’ll see there is more good than you realize, and you’ll find that sadness, anxiety and depression are diminished 

11. Give back.

Be generous with your time and your money. Give to others in need. Give to those you love and care for. Those who give back have a sense of selflessness and humanitarianism. Those who are generous in spending money on others tend to have good health, perhaps because giving has a feel-good effect that lowers blood pressure and stress.

12. Surprise yourself.

It’s hard to feel happy if you are bored or feeling blah about life. Part of feeling happy is feeling stimulated, interested and a little surprised by life. So surprise yourself by setting goals outside your comfort zone. Put yourself in new or unexpected situations. Set goals for yourself and then work to achieve them. And remember to enjoy the ride!

13. Listen to and engage with music.                       

Listening to music lifts our spirits. It makes us feel better, in part because listening to music causes our brains to release dopamine, a neurochemical connected to pleasure and reward. Those who engage with music through dance or through attending concerts report high levels of happiness and a sense of well-being.

14. You do you.

One of the best things you can do to boost your happiness is to just be yourself. That means not being dependent on the approval of others, but accepting yourself for who you are. Spend some time getting to know yourself. What defines you? What do you believe in? Who are you, underneath it all? Search for ways to be comfortable in your own skin.

15. Build meaningful relationships.

Happiness, love, friendship and community go hand in hand. As humans, we have a fundamental need to interact and connect with others. We naturally seek our tribe -- the people who will support us, understand us and be there for us through life’s roller-coaster ride. Without meaningful relationships, we are lonely and isolated. 

16. Nothing compares to you.

Stop comparing yourself to everyone around you. Most importantly, stop comparing your things to all the things everyone else has. Social media has a way of making us feel like everyone else has it better than us. How often does scrolling through your newsfeed make you feel negative emotions? Allowing envy and resentment to take root robs us of appreciating what we have.

17. Stop worrying.

Constantly worrying about everything creates toxic anxiety, where your mind is steeped in negative, spiraling thoughts. Worries plague your mind and make you afraid and apprehensive about things you often have no control over. Sometimes we believe that if we worry enough, we can keep bad things from happening. But the truth is, you cannot experience joy or even contentment when you’re consumed by worry.

18. Hang out with happy people.

Ever hang out with a gloomy person and leave feeling bummed? That’s because moods can be contagious. It turns out that feelings can be transferred from one person to another, and the more we share experiences with one another, the more our emotions and behaviors become synchronized. One secret to long-term happiness is surrounding yourself with others who are also happy.

19. Spend time in nature.

Some researchers believe that today’s ultra-wired generation is actually suffering from a nature-deficit disorder. Studies have shown that the more time we spend in nature, and the more we relate to the natural world around us, the greater our sense of happiness. Our connection to nature also plays a role in maintaining positive mental health.

Related: Why You Should Take Your Work Outdoors

20. Reminisce over happy memories.

Why do we love all things retro? Perhaps because nostalgia makes us happy. Nostalgic feelings, or reminiscing about our past, can help us reconnect with feelings of love and a sense of wonder and fulfillment. Our past shapes us and defines our identity. 

The Power of a Thankful Heart

Rejoice always, pray continually, give thanks in all circumstances;for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus. (1 Thessalonians 5:16-18).

It's Not Always Easy to Give Thanks

But this is the very thing we must do in order to see God’s will accomplished in our lives. 

This is how we move into higher realms of faith for ourselves, for our city, and for our nation. When we give thanks in the midst of difficulty, we bring pleasure to God's heart and breakthrough begins. He is looking for people who live in a realm of praise and thanksgiving where the enemy no longer has an ability to hold or manipulate. Satan is defeated when we have a thankful heart because thankfulness during difficulty is a sacrifice pleasing to God. Are you thankful?

Are you thankful for your present circumstances? 

Are you thankful for your salvation, your friendships, and your job? 

Are you thankful for the way God made you?

Thankfulness is a Key to Your Life 

It is the key that turns your situation around because it changes you, your outlook, and your attitude. There is power in a thankful heart. Thanksgiving brings contentment. An attitude of thanksgiving accepts and embraces God’s will. Begin to thank God for all the blessings he has given instead of dwelling on the negative. Discontent dries up the soul. Look at what Elisabeth Elliott, who lost her husband on the mission field and faced multitudes of hardships, says about loving God's will and being content: 

To love God is to love His will. It is to wait quietly for life to be measured by one who knows us through and through. It is to be content with His timing and His wise apportionment. It is to follow in the steps of the Master, as did Paul, who was able to say that he had learned contentment no matter what the circumstances. His circumstances when he wrote that? Prison. No easy lesson, but great gain, which is the sum of godliness plus contentment. (1 Timothy 6:6) 

Look at the Example of Jesus

He followed the will of His Father to the very end. He obeyed without complaint. In Philippians 2:5-8, Paul says that we should have that same attitude. Jesus made Himself nothing and took on the very nature of a servant. He humbled Himself and became obedient to death. We also are to have this same attitude with a humble and thankful acceptance of God’s will for our lives. Jesus embraced hardship without a complaint.

The Duke of Wellington was a British military leader who regretted that he had not learned the secret of praise during his lifetime. He had many great accomplishments and even defeated Napoleon at Waterloo. He was a brilliant and demanding man and when he was older, he realized that there were areas in his life that needed to change. In his old age a woman asked him this question, “What would you do differently if you had your life to live over again?”

He thought carefully and said, “I would give more praise.”

This is a lesson for all of us.

To learn to be people of praise and thanksgiving to God all the days of our lives would be a great accomplishment. There is greatness and happiness in thanksgiving.

“Would you know who is the greatest saint in the world?... It is he who is always thankful to God, who wills everything that God wills, who receives everything as an instance of God’s goodness and has a heart always ready to praise God for it… Could you therefore work miracles, you could not do more for yourself than by this thankful spirit, for it turns all that it touches into happiness.” —William Law

David writes in Psalm 116:17, 

"I will sacrifice a thank offering to you and call on the name of the LORD." 

Did you know that thanking God for a difficulty is actually an offering that He highly values? You are bringing a gift of thanks to Him. It is so easy to complain. It is so easy to point the finger and find fault. But to come with the opposite attitude and give thanks brings breakthrough and joyful contentment.

How to Practice Thankfulness

Let each of us seek to have an attitude of gratitude and thanksgiving, and rise to a new level of holiness. Here are some ways to practice this attitude in everyday life:

Thank and praise God for everything in your life.

Thank Him for even the difficulties. It is a sacrifice to do this but He can turn troubles into triumph.

Through Jesus, therefore, let us continually offer to God a sacrifice of praise—the fruit of lips that confess his name. (Hebrews 13:15)

Don’t allow yourself to complain about anything.

During the difficult times, be very careful to watch your tongue. Instead of complaining, think of ways you can verbally offer God the sacrifice of thanksgiving.

Do everything without complaining or arguing, so that you may become blameless and pure, children of God without fault in a crooked and depraved generation, in which you shine like stars in the universe. (Philippians 2:14-15)

Don’t compare yourself with others.

Don’t wish your life were different. God knows what is best. The Bible says that having a thankful heart is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus. When we begin to thank God for what we have, rather than comparing ourselves with others, it opens the door for God’s blessings.

Each one should test his own actions. Then he can take pride in himself, without comparing himself to somebody else. (Galatians 6:4)

Most of Us Need Breakthrough in Prayer 

The enemy is fighting hard with fiery darts of discouragement and lies. The way we will begin to deal with the lies and the vicious ways he tries to destroy our joy is through the power of a thankful heart. As we cultivate a lifestyle of worship and praise in the magnificent splendor of God, we will be able to break through the strategies of the enemy. A worshipful and thankful life permeates the atmosphere with the presence of God, because worship is the atmosphere where God’s truth dwells.

These new web sites on prayer will help you grow in your walk with God with an attitude of thanksgiving. They are filled with teaching on every aspect of prayer as well as Houses of Prayer - Intercessors Arise International and Nations House of Prayer Equipping Center.

“God smiles when we praise and thank Him continually. Few things feel better than receiving heartfelt praise and appreciation from someone else. God loves it, too… An amazing thing happens when we offer praise and thanksgiving to God. When we give God enjoyment, our own hearts are filled with joy."  —William Law