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Family Restoration Possible Through Shared Focus

When A Marriage Breaks Down, Separation Or Divorce May Become Unavoidable. However, The Decision You Make Does Not Have To Serve A...

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When a marriage breaks down, separation or divorce may become unavoidable. However, the decision you make does not have to serve as the final chapter, especially when children are involved. Every family experiences different challenges, milestones, and emotional moments. No two families face the same situations in exactly the same way. Whether it is conflict, healing, or growth, each must follow its own unique path. While some journeys may twist and turn, others can lead to recovery. It is important for families to begin restoring not just relationships between individuals, but also the unspoken narratives, values, and emotional patterns that shape how each person sees themselves and one another moving forward. Here are a few tips to help parents navigate the process of reconciliation: A father must show up physically and emotionally. Even after years of detachment, restoration is still possible when bitterness gives way to healthy boundaries, open honesty, and a shared focus on helping the family heal. A father seeking to reconcile with his children must be prepared to show up, both physically and emotionally, even when the process feels overwhelming or when doors are shut in his face repeatedly. The desire to change the narrative must outweigh the shame or fear of a negative response after years of estrangement and neglect. Consistency is key in reconciliation. Taking responsibility for your actions without being defensive will help your family respond with empathy rather than hostility. Be mindful of what you say about your ex-partner to your children. Every negative comment made to condemn their mother’s choices will only deepen their inner conflict and jeopardise the possibility of reconciliation. Reconciliation can be a slow process. Let love, not guilt, guide it so that trust and affection can be rebuilt gradually and without pressure. You cannot undo the time spent apart, but you can change the time ahead, making it more meaningful and memorable for your children. Approach the present with patience and humility to rebuild trust and open a new chapter. A mother must avoid projecting her pain onto her children Even though your feelings as a mother, carrying the emotional burden for years, are justified, your children should not have to bear that pain forever. There comes a time when everyone must find the strength to forgive and place the family’s emotional well-being above personal hurt. When you become emotionally dependent on your children while they suppress their feelings to protect yours, it creates an unhealthy role reversal that can harm their development. As a mother, it is important to reflect on how you portray your ex-partner during conflict or separation. Subtle pressures to take your side can create emotional confusion for the children. When a mother unconsciously transfers her pain onto her children, it can have lasting negative effects on their emotional well-being. It is far healthier to process your pain or seek professional support than to burden your children with it. Children do not need a perfect family, but they do need the emotional freedom to love both parents, even when those parents make mistakes.

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Can Saw Palmetto Treat An Enlarged Prostate?

Scientific Evidence Shows Little Or No Benefit. Marketed As A Natural Remedy For An Enlarged Prostate,...

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Scientific evidence shows little or no benefit.

Close-up of ripe berries on a branch of a saw palmetto tree; the berries are used in the making of a dietary supplement.

Marketed as a natural remedy for an enlarged prostate, saw palmetto is a top-selling dietary supplement. It's extracted from berries that grow on saw palmetto palm trees, which are native to the southeastern United States.

By one estimate, more than a third of all US adults who take supplements use saw palmetto specifically. Some evidence suggests that saw palmetto has anti-inflammatory properties, and its use as folk medicine dates back over a century.

But experts at Harvard say men should view its supposed benefits for prostate health skeptically. "Saw palmetto is unlikely to harm you, but it probably won't provide any major benefits either," says Dr. Heidi Rayala, an assistant professor of urology at Harvard Medical School and Beth Israel Deaconess Medical Center.

BPH and the potential effect of saw palmetto

It's common for men to develop an enlarged prostate, or benign prostatic hyperplasia (BPH), when they get older. BPH impedes urinary flow through the urethra, causing obstructive symptoms that can worsen with time.

Just how saw palmetto might act on the prostate to improve symptoms isn't entirely clear, however. Some evidence suggest it mimics the effects of certain drugs used for treating BPH, including 5-alpha reductase inhibitors such as finasteride (Proscar), which shrink the prostate gland.

In the US, no herbal supplement is approved as BPH treatment. The American Urological Association cautions that studies backing saw palmetto for treating enlarged prostates have numerous flaws, including short durations and a lack of placebo controls. Most of the supporting evidence comes from small studies paid for by companies that sell dietary supplements.

What do randomized clinical trials show?

The best-conducted research shows no benefits from saw palmetto for BPH. During one study, 225 men with moderate to severe BPH were treated with either a placebo or 160 milligrams (mg) of saw palmetto, taken twice daily for a year. The investigators detected no difference in outcomes, but they also acknowledged that doses tested in the study may have been too low to produce measurable effects.

So, during a larger subsequent study, researchers tested higher doses of saw palmetto ranging up to 320 mg given three times a day. Nearly 370 men ages 45 and older were randomized to treatment or placebo groups. After year and a half, men in both groups reported feeling either no worse or a little better. Remarkably, 40% of the placebo-treated men said symptoms had improved, suggesting the simple act of taking a pill could have something to do with the supplement's perceived benefits.

Dr. Michael Barry, a professor of medicine at Harvard Medical School, led the study. He urges men to consult with their doctors before trying saw palmetto, mainly to rule out other potential causes of urinary obstruction, which can include bladder or prostate cancer. And saw palmetto may interfere with the blood's clotting ability, making it risky for men who take blood thinners.

Recent results and comments

The latest evidence on saw palmetto and BPH comes from a Cochrane Review of 27 placebo-controlled studies enrolling a combined 4,656 participants. Results published in 2024 showed no improvement in urinary symptoms or quality of life from taking saw palmetto (alone or with other herbal supplements) over durations ranging up to 17 months.

"If the ingredients in these herbal products worked well for urinary symptoms, drug companies would have already had them approved by the FDA as a medicine that insurance companies would have to cover," Dr. Rayala said. "It's okay to take them, but just be cautious about spending too much of your own money on these alternatives."

"It is easy to understand why so many find taking a naturally occurring supplement for treating urinary difficulties in middle age appealing," said Dr. Marc Garnick, the Gorman Brothers Professor of Medicine at Harvard Medical School and Beth Israel Deaconess Medical Center, and editor in chief of the Harvard Medical School Guide to Prostate Diseases. "However, evidence of effectiveness with saw palmetto is lacking, and its use for BPH and other common urinary symptoms without a full evaluation of the potential cause should be discouraged."

Harvard Health Publishing

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